Fantasyland.

OK. So I failed my last mission. I acknowledge and accept it. Time to move on.

Today I was pondering different blog topics and how each topic would potentially play out if I chose it. I spent probably a good 15 minutes thinking about where each blog would end up. Then it occurred to me that not only do I have many normal dreams, (not that the actual dreams themselves are normal - I mean I have nighttime dreams) I am also a perpetual daydreamer. I have full out fantasies in my mind everywhere: work, on the bus, during everyday conversations with others, at night before I fall asleep, during lectures (not that I attend lectures NOW, but I used to not too long ago).

I spend a LOT of time just letting my mind wander off. Sometimes I think about what I'm actually doing and why I'm doing it, sometimes I replay events in my head and give them alternative endings which are usually more favorable for me than they were in actuality, sometimes I'll even introduce different people into the scenario and judge how their specific personality would change the dynamics of the situation. I also often wonder what people I know are doing at that very moment. And sometimes...the daydreams get kind of sexy. This happens on the bus usually. It makes me giggle to know that I'm thinking something of that nature in a place where its less than appropriate.

Anyway, then it occurred to me that maybe I have a problem. Is this healthy or unhealthy behaviour? Am I living in a fantasy world? Do I spend too much time thinking about what COULD HAVE happened rather than what REALLY happened? So here's what I did; I made a list of pros and cons to help me decide. See below.

CONS

• i get terribly distracted from reality
• public laughter at inappropriate times leads to embarrassment.
• not focusing on actual task or situation leads to decreased productivity (for example, i made this list, and essentially wrote this blog, while at work)
• i create unrealistic outcomes for situations and I let myself down because things RARELY work out they same way I dream they will.

PROS

• helps maintain a vivid imagination - key for someone like myself who tries to tap into creativity every now and again.
• its FUN. plain and simple.
• its like a movie in my head only its FREE. and it always ends the way i want it to.
• doing it makes me happy.

As you can see by my extensive list above, the pros and cons are equal. Now it only depends on how much significance each point gets. I say that since the daydreaming has yet to leave me socially inept or take me away from the world to such an extent that I'm shucking my responsiblities, I am still in the "healthy" category. I fear that maybe one day I will slide over onto the "unhealthy" side of things without even noticing. Its at this point that I dream someone will prepare an intervention.